I’d like to crawl out of the “gutter” a minute and publish a lovely email I received today from an unhappy customer of Covered in Beer. I put my “knitting” piece on Ravelry.com, which is a forum for people who knit, just to see what they thought about it and to hopefully give them a laugh. Satire never hurt anyone too badly, but apparently it did this woman. I obviously added the graphics and links to enhance it a bit. I edited it by breaking up a few long paragraphs, but I didn’t add or remove any words. I can’t wait to hear if you agree with my new friend Beth and her annoying email address.
Dear Mr. Cochran,
Your so-called “article” about knitting that you callously posted on our community message boards on ravelry.com has been passed to me a couple of times and frankly I’m fed up with it. I have asked the moderators to permanently remove your work from the site and have also asked them to ban you and the likes of your “work” permanently. Ravelry is a community free of most of the scum that floats around the Internet everyday, but somehow, you got past our defenses.
I guess you claim your article to be satire but I see it is hurtful drivel. What has anyone in the knitting community done to you to deserve to be the butt of this ill-formed hit piece? I love to knit, do it everyday, but that doesn’t define me as you claim like some deranged addict. Most of the people I know who knit have many hobbies and very well rounded lives, so you couldn’t be more wrong in your depiction of us.
I wish this was my only grievance with your silly website, but when I decided to contact you, I unfortunately had to visit it and noticed a few other putrid instances of your opinion. Blue Cheese? Really? The sad little fake historical “facts” you include in that piece do a great disservice to your readers. I’ve never read so much disdain in my life over a food item. You’re like a little girl. Can’t you just dislike it and move on?
Oh! Then we get to this horrendous attack on classical music. What are you, some anti-intellectual? I guess that’s obvious from your poor use of grammar and punctuation, but it is incredible that the few folks who read this blog haven’t called you out on your lack of taste. I see that a few kind souls tried in the comments section, but you responded with some smart-ass response instead of taking heed of what they say. Enjoy your time in the gutter, but leave the rest of us alone.
I’ve gotten a little off topic here, but I guess I needed to get this stuff off my chest. I have reported your “blog” to WordPress and will encourage my fellow Ravelry.com users to do so as well until you and your work are removed from the site. Most of them think it is cute and funny but I guess they are just too kind to see it for what it really is: cruel. What kind of things do you love? Maybe I’ll start a blog about how horrible those things are, but I wouldn’t want to stoop to your level. Knitting helps people; you don’t. I guess I’m consoled by the fact that your blog is so insignificant and won’t be able to influence too many people. But it needs to be gone from our community. Hopefully, I can see to that.
Not so truly yours,