Beer, Classical Music, Humor, Uncategorized

“Covered” Complaint Letter

I’d like to crawl out of the “gutter” a minute and publish a lovely email I received today from an unhappy customer of Covered in Beer. I put my “knitting” piece on, which is a forum for people who knit, just to see what they thought about it and to hopefully give them a laugh. Satire never hurt anyone too badly, but apparently it did this woman. I obviously added the graphics and links to enhance it a bit. I edited it by breaking up a few long paragraphs, but I didn’t add or remove any words. I can’t wait to hear if you agree with my new friend Beth and her annoying email address.

Dear Mr. Cochran,

mean-old-ladyYour so-called “article” about knitting that you callously posted on our community message boards on has been passed to me a couple of times and frankly I’m fed up with it. I have asked the moderators to permanently remove your work from the site and have also asked them to ban you and the likes of your “work” permanently. Ravelry is a community free of most of the scum that floats around the Internet everyday, but somehow, you got past our defenses.

I guess you claim your article to be satire but I see it is hurtful drivel. What has anyone in the knitting community done to you to deserve to be the butt of this ill-formed hit piece?  I love to knit, do it everyday, but that doesn’t define me as you claim like some deranged addict. Most of the people I know who knit have many hobbies and very well rounded lives, so you couldn’t be more wrong in your depiction of us.

I wish this was my only grievance with your silly website, but when I decided toYuck-Face-Little-Boy-Image contact you, I unfortunately had to visit it and noticed a few other putrid instances of your opinion. Blue Cheese? Really? The sad little fake historical “facts” you include in that piece do a great disservice to your readers. I’ve never read so much disdain in my life over a food item. You’re like a little girl. Can’t you just dislike it and move on?

Oh! Then we get to this horrendous attack on classical music. What are you, some anti-intellectual? I guess that’s obvious from your poor use of grammar and punctuation, but it is incredible that the few folks who read this blog haven’t called you out on your lack of taste. I see that a few kind souls tried in the comments section, but you responded with some smart-ass response instead of taking heed of what they say. Enjoy your time in the gutter, but leave the rest of us alone.

I’ve gotten a little off topic here, but I guess I needed to get this stuff off my chest. I have reported your “blog” to WordPress and will encourage my fellow users to do so as well until you and your work are removed from the site. Most of them think it is cute and funny but I guess they are just too kind to see it for what it really is: cruel. What kind of things do you love? Maybe I’ll start a blog about how horrible those things are, but I wouldn’t want to stoop to your level. Knitting helps people; you don’t. I guess I’m consoled by the fact that your blog is so insignificant and won’t be able to influence too many people. But it needs to be gone from our community. Hopefully, I can see to that.

Not so truly yours,

Beth Daniels


111 thoughts on ““Covered” Complaint Letter”

  1. Why do we as younger people whether adults or otherwise wouldn’t think of being so obnoxious or out of character to try to hurt others in so many different ways? What is the point other than to use & abuse your time anyway? Why don’t you try it on yourself or step in other people’s shoes before you make a person unhappy with you?


      1. Hi Kirrin!
        This comment was meant for the guy who got the complaint letter from an older person who is elderly.
        I felt he was making fun of the woman who sent the complaint letter to him. He does it for fun & I really didn’t think it so fun if anyone would step into that person’s life & how old they were which then they could relate to what was being said. I had my grandparents take care of me for a few hours a day when both my parents were at work. I really felt that older people get picked on too much & I was sticking up for her as a person. Thanks for questioning me on this. I love giving of my time & abilities to clear up any & all problems that are started that help others understand how to deal with these types of problems that aren’t or don’t come into play as often that gear towards feelings & how to hurt others.


      2. Hi Rodney,
        I understood that your comment was for the author of the blog, the recipient of the complaint letter. I simply couldn’t understand your comment!
        I had read the original post on knitting and thought it was pretty funny (even given that I enjoy the odd bit of needle work). I also thought the complaint letter was a bit ridiculous, regardless of the age of the letter’s author.
        He certainly was making fun if the woman who sent the letter and to be honest I thought it was deserved. The original was a light hearted piece about knitting. Any fool could see it was just a bit of a joke. His Nana probably knits, who knows. I knit and didn’t take any offence.
        Lastly, we actually don’t know if the letter author was elderly or not. It is not her real photo and from my reading of her letter, she didn’t sound very old. I don’t think picking on the elderly for the sake of it is a good past-time. But being elderly does not make them immune from being called on their actions either.


      3. That’s very true, too! Thanks! I was just making sure blogger understood to step into other people’s shoes before doing things that would be unkind otherwise. Thanks for the reply!


  2. The guy’s not a freaking journalist. Even if he is posting mindless drivel, which could very well be the case, it’s his blog! I am not even sure how people are being misled. If people are non-serious enough to believe everything on the internet just because some dude wrote about it after a night of imbibing, then maybe they are already leading a misled life.


  3. Thanx for following my blog.
    But i have a question in mind if u dont mind answering…
    it’s kind o funny…
    good blog but.
    good day.


  4. I just had another read of your knitting piece and really, someone’s getting bent out of shape over that?
    You’re a victim of drive-by outrage. Beth was looking for a reason to swing a punch; it just happened to be you who provided it.
    As Australian housewives used to say: A cup of tea, a Bex, and a good lie down. You’ll feel so much better afterwards, Ms Daniels.


  5. Hi, thanks for following my blog. This comment is off the topic, but I found this is an easy way to contact you. In high school, my best friend’s last name was Cochran, initial J. Her brother’s name – Casey.
    Far fetched, but are you related? We lost touch after I got married.
    Keep on knitting.


  6. Hi Thomas! I have nominated you for the “Wonderful Team Readership Award!” I really enjoy reading your blog and feel you deserve some recognition! Have a wonderful day! 


  7. Haha! Not only was your knitting piece good, it also churned out this angry gem of a letter!
    Beth Daniels, if you’re reading this- if you can hate on Mr.Cochran’s writing, Mr.Cochran can hate on knitting..that’s what I think- knitting’s got some fans, his writing’s got some fans..both make the world a better place..don’t question it,’s ALL OK. But don’t take a chill pill, u very funny. And I think both of yous should keep writing! 🙂


  8. I think this lady’s biggest complaint was that your post kept popping up in the circles where she reads because someone (or someones) thought it was a joke & she disagreed with the post & didn’t want to have to see it anymore. I don’t think she was questioning your right to write it – just keep it away from where she hangs out with other die hard knitters!


  9. Hello I just look that and I thought it was funny .I howled at what you wrote .I can’t believe that lady who complain was all bent .I mean if you don’t like what one says don’t complain leave enough alone like me I love blue cheese and you hates it .Its your own right and your choice to put whatever but I won’t go trying to take your blog down .If this lady didn’t like it she should have just go do whatever not try to go evil on him and get rid of your blog that person has issues and that is what we call a troll on youtube .I looked at your responds and they were not haters so she twisted that . I am sure wordpress won’t hunt you down she has problems within herself but its her choice to be a noisy person. Thanks for the laugh of that and the blue cheese.. Be careful of what you say about my cheese or I might send you a box haha just kidding..:)


  10. I like your satire, and am a fan of mocking detractors. She is probably taking herself too seriously, and who doesn’t love to poke a little fun at that. Not sure about posting the gal’s email address, though. :/


  11. Reblogged this on The Oddity Writer and commented:
    Thomas Cochran is a man with a sharp wit, and one of the latest followers on “The Oddity Writer”. In this blog post, Cochran shares a complaint letter from a user ranting about his satire and about how she loathes it.

    However, having read Mr. Cochran’s work, I find it to be full of heart, and one of his recent posts about Don Rickles is a rather good example of that.

    Thank you for following, sir, I hope look forward to my work as much as I do yours!


  12. Awesome that in comments on your own blog you are referred to as “the guy” and “some dude.” I once got a comment that had no consonants in it, which was also pretty awesome. But it’s also special to be referred to on your own blog in the third person as if you are not there. WordPress should have a special prize for that.


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